Happy Friday. I need some light humour to finish the week – hope you get a chuckle too…

social media cartoon

Tile Grout

Some headlines:

1. Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you’ll never go anywhere again.
2. Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you drink it all in.
3. The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds, and other athletic facilities.
4. Dinner special – Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00.
5. For sale: antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.
6. Now is your chance to have your ears pierced and get an extra pair to take home.
7. Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.
8. See ladies blouses. 50% off!

Some lightbulb jokes:

Q: How many sub-editors does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: We can’t tell whether you mean “insert a new lightbulb” or “have sexual relations inside a lightbulb”. Can we reword it to remove ambiguity?

Q: How many art directors does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Does it have to be a lightbulb?

Q: How many proof readers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: The last time this was asked it involved Art Directors. Is the difference intentional? It seems inconsistent.

Q: How many writers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Why do we have to change it?

Q: How many editors does it take to change a lightbulb? A: It was supposed to be in place last week!

Q: How many publishers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Three. One to screw it in and two more to hold down the editor.

Q: How many marketing directors does it take to change a lightbulb? A: It isn’t too late to make it neon, is it?

Q: How many advertising directors does it take to change a lightbulb? A: We’re not sure because the client might change it tomorrow. Cut some editorial anyway.

Q: How many sales directors does it take to change a lightbulb? A: (pause) I get it! It’s one of those lightbulb jokes, right?

If a book about failures doesn’t sell, is it a success?

Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics. ~Fletcher Knebel~

I have always believed that writing advertisements is the second most profitable form of writing. The first, of course, is ransom notes ~ Philip Dusenberry, quoted in Eric Clark, The Want Makers: Inside the World of Advertising, 1988.